I am so excited today to talk about building relationships with students. If you’ve been following me on here or social media for a while, you’ll know that this is what I go on about the most. Because whenever people ask me.. “What’s your secret?” It’s always the same answer.
Spend time building relationships with your students.
I can not stress enough how important it is to spend the time doing this. And today I’m going to be talking about the reasons why those relationships are so important.. And ways that you can build them with your students.
Why Build Relationships?
- Spending time building relationships with students shows them that you care about them and you are interested in them and their lives.
- Relationships = Trust. And this is a huge base for getting students to work with you, complete tasks, and trust in you.
- Showing your students you’re interested in them will make them more open with you and be more motivated and willing to learn.
- Students are more willing to participate when they feel valued.
- It is easier to connect with students and help support them when they are upset or distressed when you have the relationship and trust there.
- Positive relationships with trust helps a lot in difficult and/or escalated situations.
- Students will generally want to do better for someone who they feel respects and likes them.
- Creates a more positive classroom environment.
When to Build Relationships?
Straight away.
Honestly, building relationships is always my #1 priority with all of my students. At the start of the year this is always something I put at the top of my list. By spending time developing those relationships, I already help the students to feel more settled in the classroom.
From there, I’m able to build trust with my students and help set a positive and happy classroom environment. It also allows me to find out more about my students on a more personal level.. Something that is very handy in helping to keep students engaged in work activities, as well as having fun and looking out for their best interests.
How to Build Relationships?
There are lots of different ways that you can build relationships with students. One thing to keep in mind is that everyone is different – just think of your group of friends or family members. You probably have different types of relationships with different people. So keep this in mind when trying to develop relationships with your students.
Some ideas you can try are;
- Greet your students every morning, and say goodbye to them every night.
- Ask about them and their interests. Try to write down and keep track of students individual interests or hobbies so that you can continue to ask about them through the year. This shows your student(s) that you are interested in them.
- Treat your students with kindness and respect. So often on social media I see educators reaching out and asking for ways they can get their students to respect them more.. Honestly it starts with you. Set the good example – show them respect, and they’ll respect you back.
- Take time to sit with individual students and get to know them. Share about yourself and let the conversation be open and natural.
- Listen to them. Their thoughts, ideas, reasoning.. By showing your students that you’re listening to them, it shows you care.
- Have fun with your students and try not to take yourself so serious all of the time. Having fun together is a great way to connect and keep spirits high and full of fun and laughter. All of this makes you more relatable and ‘real’ to your students.
- Give affection and praise.
- Make a point of writing home about good behavior. So often we write home about the negative behaviors, but we don’t write home about the good. Sharing good news not only helps to make your student feel good and strengthen that relationship.. But it will help strengthen your relationship with the family too.
- Be approachable. Give off a demeanour where your students feel comfortable approaching you. Whether it’s for comfort after a fall or to ask you to play a game with them. Knowing that they can approach you is a great platform for building relationships.
Those are just some quick ways that you can build relationships with your students.
What to Do if a Student and I Don’t Click?
I actually get asked this a lot. And so many educators always feel so guilty asking me this.. And wondering what they’re doing wrong to not be able to click with a student. Here’s the truth bomb..
We are all only human.
I know as educators we are in this role because we want the best for our students. But naturally, some students and us may just not click together. That’s not to say you’ll have a negative or no relationship, you just might not be able to click and develop a strong relationship like with other students.
This is when you use the other staff in your classroom. Maybe the student will click better with someone with a different personality to you. You’re not going to be everyone’s favourite person.
Again, I encourage you to look at your group of friends. You’re probably closer with some of your friends than others. And that’s ok. It doesn’t mean anything negative. It just means you click with some friends more than others. And it’s the same for your students.
Watch and see who they interact with the best and focus on developing relationships there. As the teacher of the classroom, not everything falls on you. Use your staff’s strengths to better your classroom and learning environment for your students.
It doesn’t necessarily matter which member of staff your students have the best relationship with. It just matters that they have a good, positive and healthy relationship with someone that they feel comfortable with and around.
And do not take it personal if for some students – that person isn’t you. That’s ok.
I hope you found this blog post about building relationships with students helpful. Feel free to share your thoughts and ideas in the comments section down below. And if you have a spare moment, I would love for you to be able to share this post with your friends and colleagues online.
If you are looking for information about how you can build relationships with students through distance learning.. Tune in to this podcast episode where I share some great tips and ideas for you to try.
You can also find some information about relationships with students families here.
Nikki
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